an exercise in trust

being married is a total exercise in trust. Not in your spouse, not in yourself, not in technology (for tracking of course) but in God. You have to sit there and trust that God knows whats best – not that God would protect your spouse from danger – i mean yeah you need to trust him with that. But mostly that God knows. God knows what is best for you and your family. That. that right there is where the scary part lies.

When my husband goes away for business … or even just to the office? Its a trust exercise for me. Trusting that God will protect him but also us.

Friend. I cannot even begin to describe the thoughts that go through my mind. I legit only feel comfortable when he is with me.

Yeah I know. but again – God is working on me with that.

Like this last trip he took?

I swore up and down he wouldnt be coming back. I kept telling myself: “This is it. Be prepared to raise these kids yourself”

This is actually a usual for me unfortunately. Kind of a shame moment But….

Every time those thoughts come into my mind? I just remind myself. God has us.

Thats the trick. remembering that no matter what happens? God is in control.

I pray always out loud – to remind my anxiety ridden brain: Not my will but Gods.

And most of the time I mean it.

But as always God is working on me.

I dont concentrate on the fact I had those thoughts and failed but that I kept things in perspective and know: No matter how scary? God is in control.

What about you? Do you trust God during the scariest of times?

The Lord is my strength and my shield;

My heart trusted in Him, and I am helped;

Therefore my heart greatly rejoices,

And with my song I will praise Him.

PSalm 28:7

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