Spoonie

I am a spoonie. What does that mean? Well, its a term meaning someone who suffers from a chronic illness. I suffer from several. Doesnt matter what or whatever but what matters is how God uses it right?

Well, as someone who is going through it? I never see an end. I remember the first time I suffered from this nonsense. I was 15ish. I sprained both my ankles almost at the same time. I hated it. For a while I was on crutches. Then my underarms were hurting so my parents felt bad for me so they tried putting me in a wheelchair. Then for a looooong while i was using a cane.

Y’all remember how I talked about how I asked God if He was real? This is one of those things that I was talking about.

Anyways – easy peasy right? Oh you couldnt be ever so wrong.

My friends I was subject to what seemed unending bullying.

“Shes lying”

I sprained my ankles before never needed crutches”

“She just wants attention”

Oh how I could go on. Did I stand up for myself? No. I wanted people to like me remember? I would just ignore the comments. It hurt so bad though. But this started the few years where I had literal 2 friends in high school.

God I hated it. So much.

I never felt so alone.

But i never complained – cause thats what good Christians do right? Grin and bear it cause its what I deserved right? Actually I think at this time I was still angry with God – not shocking – so i didnt care.

Back to what I was saying earlier, being a spoonie sucks. Majorly. But I know that God has a reason for that instance. It has helped me understand people better. It has opened the door so that I can share and understand what my kids are going through – oh boy. wait til that story.

God does not like when this stuff happens to us – I am firm believer in that. You cant shake that from me – but He WILL use those times to bring Him glory. Whether we know it or not.

Please remember friends – God is there. He wants to help you in your pain. He wants you to know He will never leave you and yes. What you are going through right now? God will use that. You better believe it.

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

ROmans 8:28

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