Oh. My. Word.

Y’all just when I think I got a handle on this anxiety? Just when I think I got a handle on trusting the Lord and allowing Him to work? The doubt come big time. Oh. My. Word.

So sun up real quick: I’m eating a lot of salt and drinking a lot of water. If I don’t drink a lot of water I get dizzy and weak. I have an appointment coming soon to put on a holter monitor to see what’s happening. Okay things summed up? Here we go.

I was talking with someone about my struggles – wait I wasn’t talking. I was just drinking out of my jug of 73ozs .. similar to this:

When it was told to me (in front of my awesomely abled kids too, might I add) that I was poisoning myself with too much water.

To which I responded: no, but I know it’s not normal hence my doctors appointment. And I walked away.

Then for about an hour I was riddled with anxiety and doubt. Forget that my bloodwork was normal, forget that I feel worse if I don’t drink. Forget that I’m trusting the Lord. Forget all that – apparently.

Just when I think I got this Christian life? Bam. But that just reminds me to hold on even harder to the Lord ya know? And trust in His timing. And only listen to Him.

Sigh. When will I learn?

Trust in the LORD with all your heart,

And lean not on your own understanding;

In all your ways acknowledge Him,

And He shall direct your paths.

Proverbs 3:5-6